为了提高托福写作水平,让自己的托福写作分数更高,同学们使出了浑身解数,很多同学考虑的是如何应用经典美句,如何使用高级复杂词汇以及所谓高级的句式语法,却时常忽略要先打好基础。智课网小编为考生准备了托福写作185题库独立范文及解析,考生可以通过学习范文来掌握某些表达的正确用词,也能吸取经验,找到托福高分作文的技巧,希望对广大考生有帮助。

  Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Boys and girls should attend separate schools. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

  In my country, China, people live in a culture where young boys and girls should never say love to each other. Moreover, it is absolutely a shame that such affairs happen in campus. To avoid alleged shames, some people assert that boys and girls should attend separate schools.

 

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段落

此段结构

首段,交代背景,提出某一方观点。

此段功能

首段为文章提供了背景。

  The point is, is there anything wrong when a little boy says 'I love you' to a little girl? Gone are the days when 'love' was a forbidden word in our culture, it has now, nevertheless, actually quite different connotations from that of the word in western society. People in Hollywood movies often say 'I love you' to almost every one naturally, readily and easily, including friends, family members, partners in work, even an unknown taxi driver! But in China, not surprisingly, many people have never said 'I love you' to their parents, even seldom to their mates or children. 'Love', in Chinese word, does today carry subtle connotations related to immoral affairs. It seems not a question of is there anything wrong, but a question of there must be something wrong if a teenager dares to say anything about 'love!'

 

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此段结构

本段是一个总分的结构。开头提出一个疑问。即小男孩对小女孩说“我爱你”是错吗?这是本句的一个中心句,围绕这个中心句进行了探讨。对比国内外对于“I love you”这个词的不同态度。结尾再次提出作者的问题,流露观点。

此段功能

本段是文章第二段,以提出问题的形式初步表明观点。

  Even if there must be something wrong when a teenager falls into love, is it something that so appalling even evil that we adults have to prevent or even fight? Did we ever discover any prudent evidence which clearly proves that it really is something bad? Hardly. It is in fact quite natural that a little boy admires a beautiful girl or a little girl feels a smart boy appealing. And such emotions do not harm anything. Alleged 'premature love' simply is a nonexistent concept invented by ignorance. Girls and boys actually do not even know what love is! Perhaps they merely imitate behaviors of adults around them. What we adults should do is not to make them believe 'love' is evil, but is to teach them what true love really means. Regrettably, those adults never realize that they actually fail to assume their responsibility, but presumptuously believe they are capable of eliminating love among boys and girls by separating them into different school. It will never work.

 

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此段结构

分总的结构。开头提出疑问,即表达感情应该被当成一件很可怕的事情吗?后面对论点进行了进一步解释,这并不是一件坏事,并且成人应该进行正确的引导。最后在一系列的推理上提出观点,男女分校是不合理的。

此段功能

本段是文章第三段,明确作者观点。

  Separate school once was an evil sign of discrimination of women, but today reemerges to prevent 'love affairs' among teenagers – a high school in Beijing recently announced that it has already separated girls from boys into different classes. I can hardly imagine any benefit that such a scheme could produce except for further distortions of teenagers' natures.

 

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段落

此段结构

本段前一句话结合时事对背景再做介绍,承上启下。后一句话再次强调作者观点。

此段功能

本段是文章的尾段,承接了上文,总结了观点,重新陈述了作者立场。

  满分要素剖析:

  一、 语言表达

  本文的语言优美,遣词用句行云流水,对应的是丰富的词汇量和良好的写作基础。有散文般的风韵,但同时缺少议论文的利落有力。

  Gone are the days when 'love' was a forbidden word in our culture, it has now (been), nevertheless, actually quite different connotations from that of the word in western society. 将谓语和宾语倒装提前,将when引导的定语从句置后,避免主语过长造成的头重脚轻的现象,这在句式的多样性上也做出了贡献。同时倒装带领的语句节奏是深长的慨叹的语气,表达了浓厚的主观情感。

  It seems not a question of is there anything wrong, but a question of there must be something wrong if a teenager dares to say anything about 'love!'

  Not but不是..而是..,这是一个很常用的结构,表示转折。dare to do害怕做..,有一个固定句型How dare you!这是表示“你怎么敢!”的感叹句。

  Even if there must be something wrong when a teenager falls into love, is it something that so appalling even evil that we adults have to prevent or even fight (against)?这个句子首先是even if引导的让步状语从句,假设对方立场成立,以退为进,步步拿下;appalling和evil形象准确地用在此处,表达成年人将爱这件事当做是可怕,或者是邪恶的事情;而后面的问句形式是文章的一大特色,文章中用了很多反问,疑问的句式,与反推的手法十分相衬,语气的营造上也起到了帮助。

  二、 逻辑结构

  文章采用的是反推的方式,首先提出问题,然后摆出反方观点,一步一步证伪,最后表明自己的立场或者提出建议。属于从反面论证的形式。同时,作者采用的是循序渐进的节奏。首先,作者并没有急于给出观点,而是对“爱”的情感表达进行充分的讨论,侧面流露出自己的意见,然后接下来就人们的误解给出自己的建议和看法,接着总结男女分校的做法是不合理的,摆出自己的观点。

  这种有步骤,层次明确的结构与作者选择的反推的论证方法是相对应的。

【托福写作在线批改】

  独立写作185题库是ETS公布的托福考试经典官方作文题库,收录在托福考试官方指南(Official Guide)的附录中,在托福考试改革之前,是作文真题的主要来源。现在的托福考试对官方作文题目进行了扩大,但是185题库仍然和考试作文真题紧密相连,为考生提供最权威最真实的托福范文参考和写作练习。SmartStudy的教学专家对185题库的逐题讲解,从考题精读,头脑风暴,范文展示,甚至是同类题型的归纳等多个方面切入,将平面简短的文题毁灭性地分崩离析,以思路指导清晰其面貌,以生动的观点和事例丰满其个性,提供更完整更立体的试题透视途径,准确击碎写作障碍。

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